Inside the rise of Lily James – from childhood tragedy to A-list liaison that threatened her career
WITH her extraordinary talent, flawless looks and quiet determination, British star Lily James has emerged as one of Hollywood’s hottest players.
The 34 year old, who shot to fame as Lady Rose MacClare in Downton Abbey, already had a string of hit movies to her name, including Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again in 2018 and 2019’s Yesterday, before her high-profile role as Baywatch star Pamela Anderson in Hulu’s hit series Pam & Tommy.
But while her acting career goes from strength to strength, her love life is the one area where Lily isn’t living the fairy tale.
The actress returned to London after calling it quits with Michael Shuman, the LA-based Queens Of The Stone Age bassist, in July.
It was Lily’s third very public break-up – following a scandalous liaison with fellow actor Dominic West, which came shortly after her split from partner of five years, actor Matt Smith, in 2020.
However the pair have reportedly rekindled their romance, after they were spotted leaving the Harold Pinter theatre where Lily is appearing in controversial feminist play Lyonesse opposite Oscar-nominated actress Kristin Scott Thomas.
Her performance has been described by one critic as “flawless”.
Little wonder, as according to friends, it’s heartbreak and relationship upheaval that actually makes her more determined to succeed.
One long-term friend, who has known her since her days at Guildhall School of Music, says: “She’s one of a kind. She’s fun, she’s fearless and she’s incredibly independent. She will never be defined by a man or a relationship she’s in.
“When things go wrong in relationships, or in life, she doesn’t mope, she doesn’t complain – a break-up always makes her challenge herself and throw herself into work. She will never be a Bridget Jones.
She will always be Lily James, and surprise everyone with her next move.”
Lily revealed her personal relationship mantra when she talked about her interpretation of the character of Cinderella when she played the Disney princess in the 2015 film.
She said: “She’s not waiting around for a prince to rescue her, and she’s dealing with life as best as she can. She’s following what her parents taught her about having courage and being kind. And she’s finding happiness and joy in her life despite the sort of horrible circumstances that she’s in.”
Within weeks of her latest split, Lily was typically upbeat in a radio interview.
Refusing to bemoan her single status or dish the dirt on disastrous dates, she said: “I’ve been a sort of serial relationshipper, so I’ve not had any crazy dating stories. However, I did go on my mates’ [dating app] Hinge the other day and I just despaired. I mean, come on… The guys, they were rubbish.”
Her friend adds: “That’s classic Lily. When things have gone wrong in her personal life, whatever she is feeling inside, she gets up, she smiles and she pushes herself harder to the next level.
“She will reinvent herself, reinvigorate herself. She surrounds herself with her friends, her family, and she just makes it work. She never plays to type, but that’s why she’s become the superstar she is today. She clings on to work – in a way, she feels it saves her. That goes back a long way to her childhood and teenage years.”
Her decision to temporarily relocate from Los Angeles to London is a brave move.
It is also a masterstroke in terms of her acting profile. Her recent performance as Pamela Anderson in Pam & Tommy earned her a nomination for a Golden Globe, a Primetime Emmy and A-list status.
But, as one LA agent admits: “There isn’t anything Hollywood is more in awe of than an actress who can be a movie star but who has earned their stripes in British theatre. Moving from mass popcorn culture to British high brow – that’s how to go from having a moment in the sunshine to having a golden career.”
‘When things go wrong, she pushes herself to go to the next level’
Lily James – born Lily Chloe Ninette Thomson – is the daughter of actor and musician Jamie Thomson and actress Ninette.
She grew up in Esher, Surrey, with her elder brother Charlie and younger brother Sam. Her grandmother was the actress Helen Horton, who famously played the voice of Mother in the blockbuster film Alien.
Lily has described her childhood as “idyllic,” up until the point when tragedy struck with the death of her grandmother and uncle when she was a teenager.
Then, when she was just 18 years old, her beloved father died from cancer.
His death coincided with her acceptance into the prestigious Guildhall school.
She changed her surname to James in his honour and, although she rarely speaks publicly about the impact of the loss of her father, she admitted in 2019: “He was so artistic and so bold. There was so much life in him. He was brilliant.”
Much of Lily’s attitude to relationships and work is tied up in her grief for him.
In her father’s youth, he tried to make it in Los Angeles. “There were periods of his life when he went at it hard, like in the ’70s when he was an actor living on Sunset Boulevard with a musician friend, when everyone was taking acid,” she said in an interview in 2019.
In his early 30s, Jamie was involved in a car crash: “My dad had big scars over his face and his shoulders. The scarring was so bad, he suddenly went from a romantic lead to a gangster,” Lily said.
He never got the break his daughter did.
For Lily, his death at the very start of her journey as a professional actress made her determined to prove herself for him. It also gave her a sense of the fragility of life and love.
“Drama school was a lifeline for me, it saved me,” she has said. “I found it very nurturing – I just clung on. I will never stop trying to be better at what I do.”
Lily has done her father proud. Within the space of a decade, she has become a star on both sides of the Atlantic. She became the face of Charlotte Tilbury in 2022, and has appeared in modelling campaigns for designer brands including Versace and Burberry.
‘Lily’s liaison with Dominic West threatened her career’
As an actress, she has moved effortlessly from period dramas (2016’s War & Peace to 2018’s The Guernsey Literary And Potato Peel Pie Society), to action movies (2017’s Baby Driver), blockbuster musical Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again, as well as romcoms like last year’s What’s Love Got To Do With It?.
She has morphed from blonde to brunette to redhead, and has shown she can easily switch from her native “posh” home counties accent to Pamela Anderson’s Canadian twang.
But it is her way of turning loss and hardship into a means of driving forwards that really sets Lily apart.
After leaving drama school, she dated Jack Fox (brother of actor turned right-wing commentator Laurence Fox) and appeared in TV shows including Just William and Secret Diary Of A Call Girl.
She and Jack split in 2012, and by the end of the year she had grabbed the nation’s attention when she appeared on screens as headstrong, charismatic Lady Rose in the hit ITV series, Downton Abbey.
Her path to stardom was set. Then, in 2014, she met Doctor Who star Matt Smith, now 41, on the set of Pride And Prejudice And Zombies, and they soon began dating.
“It was real love with Matt,” recalls Lily’s friend.
“They moved in together and for five years they were like this young, hot couple.
“Matt’s six years older than Lily and they sparked off each other. Both their careers were on super-charge – Lily’s in particular – and it didn’t work out. There were a lot of hurtful rumours that flew around.”
They split in 2020, citing “hectic work schedules” as the reason for the break-up with unfounded rumours circulating that Matt had become close to the actress Claire Foy, his co-star in The Crown.
“Lily was pretty heartbroken, but she didn’t give into any of the gossip. She accepted their relationship just hadn’t worked and, incredibly, they have stayed really good friends.”
Single for the first time in half a decade, Lily ricocheted into a high-profile fling with Hollywood actor Chris Evans (she and the Captain America star were photographed in London parks together) and an unfortunate rumoured liaison in October 2020 with the married actor, Dominic West, her co-star in the miniseries, The Pursuit Of Love.
Photos of the unlikely pair – he is 20 years her senior – as they shared a scooter ride during a stay in Rome, where they were also photographed in a clinch over lunch, threatened to seriously damage her career.
He returned home to his aristocratic Irish wife, Catherine FitzGerald, and their four children, posing outside their Wiltshire mansion and passing a handwritten statement to photographers saying their marriage was “strong”.
Lily, pursued by paparazzi and mercilessly shamed online, sought solace in her friends and family, taking long walks with her soon-to-be co-star Emma Thompson.
She began work on her next major project, What’s Love Got To Do With It?.
Her only comment so far has been a cryptic remark during an interview in 2021, when she said: “I’m not really willing to talk about that. There is a lot to say, but not now, I’m afraid.”
She has never discussed her private life, once saying: “In regards to your love life, you’re just entering into a whole lot of pain if you talk about it. If you’ve never said anything, there are no sound bites to haunt you when you’re crying into a box of Kleenex after it all goes wrong.”
On Valentine’s Day 2021, four months after those photos with West, Lily’s love life seemed to have taken a different turn. She was reportedly spotted in Suffolk kissing rock star Michael Shuman.
And when, 18 months later, the two were pictured – with Lily’s mum, no less – house hunting in north London, it was starting to look like Lily might have finally found her Prince Charming.
“Lily loved that he was a musician like her dad,” says the friend. “It was basically the first time she’d been in a relationship with someone who wasn’t an actor, and she found being with him really inspiring.
“But it’s tough. She works really hard. Her schedule is full for years in advance and he is on tour a lot, so it’s always about schedules, compromise and, in the end, something has to give.
“Lily didn’t want to just sit around in Los Angeles. The writers’ strike has meant that very little filming has been happening and she just thought she should do something different, move on, push herself.”
‘Her father’s death is what pushes her on to make the most of life’
It seems she might just have been craving a bit more of a normal life, too. “You can get lost in Hollywood,” the friend continues. “Pam & Tommy was a game-changer for her. She’s a real A-list star now, but it’s all froth, red carpets and glitz, and she just wanted to take
a bit of control, get back to what she loves – home, the theatre, working with Kristin Scott Thomas, who she’s starred with before and adores. Lily simply never stands still.”
As she forges ahead alone, Lily can rely on her tight-knit group of friends from her days at Tring Park School For Performing Arts, including The Witcher actor Bart Edwards, as well as Guildhall friends including actors Gala Gordon and Freddie Fox. One said: “On the surface, Lily seems to have had such a charmed life, but she has had so many bumps in the road.
“Losing her dad at 18 is something she will never really recover from. She adored him, and he adored her, too. He was a feisty guy, and she’s a feisty lady.
It must be hard for any man to match up to him and it is also hard to think of anything more difficult to overcome than losing him.
“It’s always difficult when a relationship comes to an end, but for Lily, nothing could ever be harder than losing him. His loss is what pushes her on to make the most of everything she has and does.
“She’s done everything her way. She’s made mistakes but she’s never let anything totally drag her down.”
With a critically acclaimed West End run and two new movies lined up for this year, Lily James’ star looks set to rise and rise.