I'm divorced and won't be spending Thanksgiving with my kids. We are celebrating early with food they love.

• I'm divorced, and I have my kids for Thanksgiving only in even years.
• Though we'll celebrate a week early this year, I plan to make it special.
• I'm planning to make food I know my kids like eating.

As a divorced parent, I won't have my kids this Thanksgiving break. It's an odd year, and I have my kids for Thanksgiving only in even years. The same thing goes for Christmas.

So this year, I'm celebrating with my kids a week before Thanksgiving Day. I'm planning to make it a special day together.

Not seeing my kids for holidays is hard, but I try to focus on what I can do for them

Being separated from my kids brings longing, anxiety, and deep sadness. This time of year makes me feel exhausted with grief for when making plans was simpler.

I try to focus on positive thoughts and on making our Thanksgiving meal as yummy as possible for my kids.

My kids, who are 11 and 8, notice the differences at their parents' homes during the holidays. While there may be more people at the other parent's holiday events, I customize holiday meals to my kids' tastes, and they can be themselves at my table.

I've learned to depend on myself to keep traditions going. No matter which parent's year it is, I don't want my kids to miss out on holiday treats and celebrations.

I'm planning a Thanksgiving menu with foods my kids enjoy

I don't cook big meals and have never shined in the kitchen. Our Thanksgiving dinner will probably last less than 20 minutes — but it'll have foods I know my kids like and will eat.

Buying special holiday-themed dinnerware has been put on the back burner of my mind while rebuilding my life and home after divorce because I can't afford it.

That said, I'll make a small antipasto platter on a new decorative dish I bought with autumn leaves and the word "thankful" in the center. I imagine my son reaching for cucumbers, pickles, and some chips and guacamole. I'm sure my daughter will want some grapes and strawberries on her plate next to her pasta, as she did last year.

This year, the dessert will be store-bought Italian cookies and ice cream. I won't dwell on making a pie, though maybe I'll try next year.

Our feast may look slightly different without stuffing, squash, corn, green beans, and pumpkin pie. For me, carving out time together to celebrate, even briefly, is what matters.