The 8 red flags that prove you are dating a narcissist & ‘being attentive’ is a trigger warns dating expert
WITH the rose-tinted glasses on, it can be hard to spot the red flags in a new partner.
But one dating expert has revealed the eight red flags you to be on the hunt for which could reveal if your partner is a narcissist.
Tina Wilson, British founder of Wingman, reveals how narcissistic traits range from having an unreasonable high sense of their own importance and seeking attention and admiration.
That being said, she revealed to the Mailonline eight warning signs to look out for as narcissists often fail to care or understand their partner, causing the relationship to breakdown.
Being too attentive
“If it seems too good to be true, than it probably is,” a phrase we’ve all heard and one that should be taken seriously when it comes to dating.
Tina reveals narcissist often become everything their new partner wants in the early stages.
“This includes being attentive, caring, slightly jealous and always present or thinking of you, even answering texts and calls whenever you need them. Beware though, this doesn’t last long,” she explained.
Not to be confused with the honeymoon phase, this attentiveness will be self-serving and something you should keep your eye on as the relationship progresses.
They’re never wrong
If you find yourself second-guessing yourself or version of events you need to pay attention to your partner sayings the dating pro, adding that a true narcissist will never admit they are wrong.
A healthy relationship is based on compromise and bringing out the best in each other.
But if you find it brings out insecurities or changing to the detriment of yourself, it might be time to take space and think about how things are going.
Giving themselves third-party admiration
Narcissist love proving they are the best and will often do it by using terms such as ‘people think I’m great.’
Try flipping the tables and talk about your own accomplishments to see how your partner acts.
“If magically the conversation suddenly has a way of bringing them back into the spotlight, then they are likely displaying narcissistic behaviours and are not celebrating you,” Tina added.
Living in a fantasy
If they constantly tell you incredible stories of their connections or experiences but get explosive when you question them – it could be a sign they aren’t telling you the full truth.
Manifesting and living in a fantasy are two very different things.
Approach the conversation calmly, says the dating expert, adding that a check on social media can give you answers.
No social media presence could be cause to set alarm bells off.
Gaslighting you
Often they make you reliant on their opinion or memory of events – and can wrap you in by being attentive to secure you she explained.
She added: “Then they begin to show their true self and start to criticise your behaviour or the way you dress to make you question yourself.
“If you were to dare bring one of these conversations up they would deflect it back to you and say they never said that or you’re too sensitive. In the dating app world we call this gaslighting.
“If you sense things are moving into gaslighting territory communicate and set your boundaries early on and see if any positive changes take place.”
Speak to friend and family as soon as possible and maintain a support network.
They turn everything around on you
Projection is a clear sign something is wrong, but it isn’t always easy to spot when you’re in the midst of it.
This could be a manipulation tactic to turn a disagreement back on you.
Tina continued: “If they keep accusing you of upsetting them when in fact there is no basis to their accusations, then you are likely dating a narcissist and should walk away. You can never change them as they see themselves as perfect.”
The King/Queen of the castle
Most narcissists have an ego that is off the scale and believe that no one else is really at their level.
Often they go through partners at turbo speed when they deem them no longer useful or can’t get away with their lies anymore she explained.
You stop listening to your friends
If you’ve become withdrawn from friends and family it could be a warning sign.
Narcissists often encourage you to withdraw for their own advantage Tina added.
It’s normal to want to spend more time with a new partner, but completely shutting off from the outside world is usually a red flag.
Instead of pushing them away, talk, as Tina revealed real friends want what’s best for you.